Wednesday, June 16, 2010

It's Vs. Day

To begin with, it's Vs. day. Syfy channel vs. 1980's/90's pop music. Tiffany vs. Debbie Gibson. Mega Python vs. Gatoroid. What, what's a Gatoroid?

And see, now I'm done with the vs. theme. I just wanted to start off with that because, really, Mega Python vs. Gatoroid...how could you go wrong. But there's other things to look at.

See, there they are down there.

It's not just that it's Lego Chess. That would be awesome enough. It's that it's Robotic. And the pieces move. And it's quite possibly the most awesome act of nerderry the world has ever seen. It's at the very least in the top 10, chess/lego related acts of nerdism that's possible.

This guy might have the most unique drum style I've ever seen. He's good, there's no doubt, it's just the way he plays pushes him over the top.

The Green Hornet trailer is all over the place, so I just picked a spot that had it and linked it over there. Seth Rogen is definitely Seth Rogen, but still it looks like fun.

Sometimes Travis sends me things that he thinks look terrible, and then, much to his chagrin, I like them. Like RED. Travis's one sentence review: "Looks like Grumpy Old Assassins." Sure, but it's got John McClane, Helen Mirren, Being John Malkovich, and the voice of the Penguin movie in it. Not to mention Dr. McCoy, Young Mr. Hooper, the original Hannibal Lector, Gans from 48 hours, Dr. Doom, and futuristic New York's most famous cabbie. Throw in Weeds, and this might be a more impressive cast than the Expendables. And I thought the trailer looked like fun.

So I guess this post ends with me vs. Travis.

Hey look at that, I brought the theme back.

Saturday, June 5, 2010

NINJAS! From NORWAY!

There's nothing about this movie that isn't awesome. First of all, it's about Norwegian Ninjas. Second of all, did you see the first part? About the Norwegian Ninjas? Cause that part was the part that was pretty awesome. Third, it's sort of based on a true story that has something to do with this guy. But really, just the Norwegian Ninjas part is pretty cool.

When I first found the video for Office War, I thought it was pretty cool, but man, Norwegian Ninjas. That's killing me.

I gave up on Lost after the last episode of season 1 because, well, there was all this cool stuff going on, and then they showed me that horrible smoke monster and I was like, meh. But this guy explains Lost in 3 minutes, so if you didn't watch it at all, or if you abandoned it somewhere along the way, like I did, well, you can save yourself all the time and trouble it would take you to go to the Wikipedia and try to figure out what happened.

This guy just makes all kinds of cool pancakes, presumably using some kind of food coloring and big plastic squirty bottles. I dug the Bacon and Egg Pancake.

Also, this is a weird webpage, and it took me a while to figure out that you had to click on the images and move the mouse around to get the guy to do things, but it's called Self Control Freak.

Saturday, May 1, 2010

Warning: Froot is not nutritious. Though it may be nootrishus.

Lawsuits. Let's see, you can argue all day about the woman who sued McDonald's over the fact that her coffee gave her 3rd degree burns and say she's an idiot because coffee is supposed to be hot (or you can argue the other side, where you find out that originally all the woman wanted was the money to cover her $20,000 medical bills, and McDonald's offered her $800. Nice.) That's all fine and good.

But here we have the last bastion of a real need for tort reform: Someone sued Kellogs claiming that they believed Froot Loops contained real fruit, and someone else sued them claiming that they believed Cap'n'Crunch with Crunchberries contained real berries.

Awesome. Welcome to the world of Absurdistan, because that's apparently where we live.

Whether you love or hate the Smurfs, Hank Azaria as Gargamel, in what is apparently going to be a live action Smurf movie, will haunt your nightmares forever.

Now this is a Cool Lego Video.

Darth Vader tells you how to get where you're going.

Let's see, we have a Stabby Robot, a Meat eating robot, some Questioning Robots, and some Robots that can track people. I've said it before, and I'll say it again, we're about a hair's breadth away from this.

Wednesday, April 21, 2010

Lakers win!

So, the Lakers beat the Thunder, who, by the way, have the worst logo ever. It drives me crazy when professional sports teams with potentially cool names who can't be bothered to come up with a good logo. I mean seriously, this is their logo. Here are one, two, three, better logos with the same name. Those are minor league teams! Come on! You're in the NBA! You can do better than that.

Anyway, Lakers play the Jazz next, so I'm all excitedey! On to the links!

This is awesome: Iron Man punches Hugh Grant.

Super Mario Crossover
So these guys spent more than a year building this game where you can play through the original Super Mario Brothers game using other Nintendo characters including

and of course, Mario himself.

Jonah Hex trailer.

I know there's a severe level of hatred for Mr. Cruise, but seriously, this trailer amuses me, and I hope this is as fun as it looks: Knight and Day. Maybe it helps if Tom plays a character who appears to be as crazy as he is in real life.

And here is your first picture of Thor, from the movie...Thor. That's Chris Hemsworth down there, looking all broody. If you don't know who that is, you may remember him as Captain Kirk's dad from the most recent Star Trek movie. So, good for him, he died in a spaceship crash and now he's a Norse God.

Monday, April 5, 2010

I will teach you now.

Here's my fascinating bit of trivia today: I bought a pack of Marlboro Menthol Ultra Lights (what I usually buy) only it didn't say Ultra Light on it, the box says "Silver Pack". I had no idea what this meant so I looked it up. Apparently European countries won't let cigarettes call cigarettes "Light" or "Ultra Light" as it implies that they're not as bad for you as normal cigarettes. So in Europe "Light" cigarettes are called "Gold Pack" cigarettes and "Ultra Light" cigarettes are called "Silver Pack". So, there. Now you're cultured.

That probably won't help you with the Grill-Off with Ultra Hand which is some kind of Nintendo Wii barbecuing game that looks terrible, but this commercial is so off the rails bizarre that I posted it anyway.

They keep making Resident Evil movies like this one: Resident Evil: Afterlife, which is apparently in 3-D and uses the James Cameron technology, which I'm pretty sure was just an excuse to stick James Cameron's name in their trailer. Good for them.

Can't wait: Iron Man 2

I can wait for this, because Brandon would have made a much better Ang than the kid they picked (that would be my son Brandon, not, you know, any of the other Brandons we know). Anyway, The Last Airbender trailer here has lots of good footage of the bending abilities, which do look neat.

Amusing little animation about old school video games taking over the world: Pixels.

More amusing: 160 of the best Arnold quotes of all time. (Warning, there's some foul language in there).

I thought this was neat on like a bunch of different levels. Solarbeat: watch our galaxy spin and make music.

I have no idea what to make of the Nissan Land Glider, except that it leans into corners. That's right, it's a car that leans into corners. Sounds dangerous.

And to cap it all off, Travis sent me a pair of Sam Jackson movie trailers. Enjoy.

Tuesday, March 16, 2010

Hoppy Easter!

Well, it's Easter and B-Fish wants his Easter blog. We're all about service around here, so here you go B-Fish. The rest of you can enjoy it too, I guess.

Apparently, this is a Test for the Swedish armed forces. It requires teamwork with a group of people you can't see. Kind of neat.

One of the greatest movies ever made is getting a prequel. In Norwegian. And I'm more than okay with that. It's exactly the prequel that should be made. And hopefully they'll make it right.

10 word Wikipedia. This is just absolutely, well, genius, really.

Specter Spelunker Shrinks is a great idea for a game. Run around, get big, get small, try to make it through the game. Mucho fun.

Steambirds, more awesome fun. Turn based dogfighting combat game.

There is very little that could make me happier than this video for Tecmo Bowl Throwback. God I loved Tecmo Bowl. I love that they used the original theme music and updated it. I love that the gameplay is the same. It SHOULD be!!! That was part of the brilliance. And looking at that screen for the playoff trees reminded me that EA still owns the NFL license, and this is why they should be shunned. Good for Tecmo Bowl using all the city names. Hah. Can't copyright city names, huh.

Fun movie news: Natalie Portman is going to star in Pride & Prejudice & Zombies. Awesome. Can't wait til I have a trailer for that to throw up here.

This Pac-Man movie trailer (fake) was done in 2004, apparently, but I still thought it was pretty funny.

New A-Team Trailer, in case you missed it.

New Expendables trailer. Statham, Jet Li, Bruce Willis, Arnold Schwarzenegger, Sylvester Stallone, Dolph Lungdren, Mickey Rourke...it's ridiculous.

Epic tale of Epic Epicness
. Scott Pilgrim vs. the World.

Monday, March 15, 2010

The Ides of March

So, beware.

How exactly did using "Ides" fall out of favor. I should try to bring that back into favor. Does it even work for any month but march? And that's all Julius Caesar isn't it? The Shakespeare play?

Whatever. On to things I care about.

Captain America bothers to cast a decent villain.


More evidence that Batman is better than Superman.

I need my mother to iron this on to a T-Shirt for me. (Thanks for all the shirts, mom! Love you!)

Predators. Nice. Check back on 3/18 for the trailer, but there's some cool sneak peek stuff up there now.

We may be getting another Heavy Metal movie after all. Technically it would be the third, but I'm going to count it as the second since the second one they made (which was for some reason subtitled: F.A.K.K.) was so terrible that I couldn't even sit through the whole thing, and it had naked chicks from start to finish. That's bad.

Tron Legacy Trailer. That's good. (That's Bruce Boxleitner! And Jeff Bridges! And sweet looking tron-cycles! YES!)

News (finally) from Christopher Nolan about Batman 3. And also, he's apparently resurrecting Superman. And also, apparently, the villain in Batman 3 will be anybody but Mr. Freeze.


Tuesday, February 23, 2010

What?

I swear, I'm updating this page in my head and not on this page anymore. I really thought the page would just update itself as long as I thought about it hard enough. I guess that's not working.

Travis pointed out the awesome comment from Feche on Saturday (hooray! I'm huge in Argentina! Apparently.) And then Berenger of all people called me out for not updating my page. Have you updated your page Berenger? Oh, right, you don't have one.

So here's my update: Bam.

What, that's not good enough for you?

What if I show you the Cop Out trailer? No? What if I Give you the RED BAND Cop Out Trailer (Careful, it's an rated R trailer)?

What if I give you the new Nightmare on Elm Street Trailer?

(This is trailer two, and it looks good.) I'm digging that they're taking this seriously. The thing that always bothered me about Nightmare on Elm Street, and the reason I was such a Ft13 guy instead, was the corny jokes just ruined everything about Nightmare for me. Freddy's punchlines got progressively dumber and more painful to watch, and at the very least Jason kept quiet and just looked creepy. Of the big 3 Horror franchises of the 80's (Ft13, Nightmare, Halloween) Freddy was a distant 3rd (though still lightyears ahead of Chucky, ugh, so terrible). But the first Nightmare is actually good. (Has Johnny Depp in it, too). It was just that after that one (which was straight horror) it turned into campy, ridiculous, "let's let Freddy have Bond-ian punchlines after every kill" horror. (For the record, those Bond-ian punchlines were killing 007 in the mid 80's to early 90's as well. This is when it became a bad parody of itself). But now it looks like they're being all serious and scary and I'm intrigued, which is something I thought no Nightmare movie would ever do for me again.

Also, who is that guy? That's a page full of useful information right there. You may need to know who that guy is some day.

So, Mom may have solved the mystery of the Bacon Bits. Note those two bottles in the picture there. The black labeled one is bacon bits. The red labeled one is bacon pieces. The black labeled one has 3.0 oz. of bacon in it. The red labeled one has 2.8 oz. of bacon in it. They both cost the exact same amount. So what's the difference? Apparently bacon pieces are slightly bigger. So .2 oz. less fit in a bottle. So, I buy the black label. I racked my brain on this for weeks. They have the exact same nutritional info. It was driving me nuts, and I was feeling like I was getting away with something by getting my extra .2 oz. of bacon. Now I know, I'm getting tinier pieces of bacon. Meh.

But now I have a new mystery. I use Pandora. I tell it a song I like and it makes a radio station that plays other songs like that song. Many of you probably use it or have used it in the past. Also, I assume many of you know my musical tastes, so it's probably not a big shock to you that at some point I made a radio station based on a Cypress Hill song. It's cool. It plays a lot of Ice Cube, Wu-Tang, Dr. Dre, things like that. And then, twice now, inexplicably, in the middle of an hour or so of having it playing in the background it plays THIS.

Now, Pandora uses some scientific, insanely complicated, more confusing than the BCS rating system formula to compare songs and determine which ones are like the one I input when I created the station. So how exactly is Yvonne Elliman singing "If I can't have you" like Cypress Hill singing "How I could just kill a man..."?

As Geoffrey Rush says in Shakespeare in Love: "It's a mystery."

Tuesday, January 5, 2010

I'm such a slacker. Welcome to 2010.

The year of me doing crazy things. So, check it out, I totally dropped the ball on updating this page, which several people have commented on (and by several I mean at least 3 different people noticed) so to make up for that I have posted the entirety of the story here.

That was also a chance for me to test Google's "Have a free web page" feature so it serves dual purposes. It's a fairly quick and easy way to make a web page, so I just stuck the whole book up there. I'll do my best to start updating here as well, though I have no idea with what right now.

Check back in a few days and see how I'm doing, and feel free to tell me to update the page every once in a while and I'll see what I can do for you.

Toad.